Everyone is
different. No two people are 100% alike—no matter how hard you look. The same
goes for deaf and hard of hearing people. We run the gamut from totally oral to
totally ASL. Some use various types of aids, while others (like me) go au
natural. Not only do we differ as people, the same person differs from day to
day. At least I know I do. Some days you can’t shut me up. Other days I can
hardly lift a finger or utter a sound.
I have to be
honest and profess that life in general as a Deaf person can be “easier” when
that person uses his or her voice while conversing with hearing people while
out in public. That does depend, however, on how well they can speak. I
personally see no trouble in carrying a notebook and jotting down my thoughts
or needs. However, sadly, many hearing people look at the paper I show them
with total confusion. “Why are you handing me paper? What am I supposed to do
with this?” Uh…read it?
That’s exactly
what happened to me the other day. I was having a no-voice kind of day. Didn’t
want to be bothered by how loud or unclear I came off as. I happily toted my
notebook with me and hadn’t run into any problems…until…
I was hungry, OK?
I really needed something to eat and Subway was calling my name. As I sat in my
car outside the restaurant, I happily jotted down—very precisely—the exact
sandwich and toppings I wanted. Clear as a bell. Easy—peasy.
When I finally
went inside, they were busy with the lunch rush, and, for some reason, I was
nervous. I often get nervous communicating with hearing people. Actually, I
have a social phobia, so I’m nervous with all people. But not being able to
hear and hearing people who can’t sign, just increases my fear a hundred fold.
Anyway, I waited
patiently, and when my turn came, I politely handed over the list of what I
wanted.
“NO!” the girl
behind the counter started mumbling and waved me off. I’m guessing she said
something about not being willing to take the paper. I pointed to my ear and
told her I was deaf and she just continued talking.
“I can’t
understand you,” I gestured. After taking a minute, I realized she didn’t want
to touch the paper with her gloves on. That it compromised her sanitary space.
“If you can’t
just talk to me, then you need to go somewhere else,” she rudely waved me away.
I indicated that I could hold the paper up and she could just read it.
Obviously, she couldn’t read, because she refused to do that as well. I was
very frustrated. It was clear that this woman, whose job is to serve the
public, didn’t want to be bothered with anything “out of the ordinary.”
I didn’t get a
sandwich that day. I because so flustered and annoyed that I just walked out. I
should have asked to talk with the manager, but I admit that sometimes I simply
don’t have the energy to bother.
Why must things be so
complicated? Why do so many people freak out if something or someone needs
something outside of the “norm?” Being deaf and the needs we have shouldn’t
debilitate us. But I can’t look at it as me causing mayhem. It’s the other
person making a fairly simple situation more chaotic than it needs to be. It
was a piece of paper, for goodness sake! I guess you have to have all your
senses and be able to accommodate the workers in order to “eat fresh.” Subway,
say it isn’t so!
