Many days I go about things with a bit of a wall around me. I've been known not to think my feelings as true facts. If I'm angry, I should deal with my anger. And if I'm happy, I should try to spread a little happiness. This might surprise you, but when I have negative emotions--usually due to being Deaf or mentally ill---it's very hard for me to deal with them. That's because borderlines have a hard time admitting they're wrong to feel something or feeling invalidated.
But one day, about 18 years ago, I was driving over to a friends' house. We'd made a time to hang out that day, Well, as I was on my way, I noticed a bunch of little kids selling lemonade. At first, I past by it and didn't pay much attention. But then I thought, I'm in a good mood. I want to do something nice for someone else. So, I made a U turn in my manual car and went back to their front yard. At that time, I didn't realize I had to put the car in gear and roll my tires so they fall toward a curb. I did none of that. All I knew was that the kids seemed very happy that I came to give them business.
I was able to communicate my want of lemonade, but within a minute, all the kids started screaming and running away. I looked over at my car only to see it was headed for us. Not only that, but it was also headed straight to the lemonade stand. and totally demolished it.
Noone was hurt, thankfully, but I don't know if I'll ever do a u-turn for a snack every again.
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